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Some executives are famous for letting others do their “dirty work.” You know who they are in your organization. This approach could be used to send tough messages, probe for motives, or hide their hand till the last minute; without becoming the person to blame if conflict spreads. The messenger becomes the scapegoat.

Trouble is, people are quick to catch on, and they will take steps to counter this behavior. This invariably leads to drop in trust.

Executives (and senior managers and those in leadership positions) will do well to remember that the medium is the message. Nothing, absolutely nothing can change the fact that a policy issued by an executive has the force of law. The same uttering by a lowly individual contributor, no matter how intelligent, no matter how respected, no matter the logic and research, will not have the same impact. Because “the boss” has and always will carry the most weight in the organization.

Your options are to become the boss (and watch what you say very carefully) or frame up the script for the boss to deliver. The latter works well because of the corporate maxim, “If you want to prosper,  make your boss look good!” The latter strategy if done in a healthy win-win manner, will broaden your perspectives and prepare you for higher responsibilities.

While it is true that reducing workload for your boss is rewarded (another corporate maxim), communicating policy is not to be undertaken by anyone other than “the boss.”

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Passive aggressive behavior abounds in the workplace. I was horrified to learn someone has written a book on the subject. This confirms my worst nightmares that the behavior is widely prevalent, and common enough for someone to research the subject.

Without pretending to be scientific, here are some reasons why I think it happens:

• Fear of conflict: You like peace and harmony so much that you don’t realize that passive aggressiveness leads to a drop in peace and harmony.
• Laziness: It is too much work to stand up for yourself.
• Fear of public failure: Why go head to head with an “enemy” stronger than yourself, guerrilla warfare has already proven to be more successful.
• Lack of skill: If you don’t know how to frame up a negative thought into a positive, and inspiring one, you are going to default to “fight” or “flight.”
• Lack of willpower: It is easier to give into your negative emotions and find a “release” with (passive) aggressive behavior. Depending on how bad your habit is, it is going to be a slog to develop the willpower to change.
• “Tuning fork syndrome:” This means your behavior is dictated by the norms you see in the workplace. You lack the inner conviction to stand up for what is right.

First step is to observe yourself, develop the self awareness that you are passive aggressive. Keep  observing yourself till you get sick of your behavior and are ready to change. The rest should follow automatically. If it does not, read my book to find out how to accelerate your change.