Monthly Archives: October 2013

#280 New boss

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A new boss is a new opportunity, a chance to make a fresh start. A new boss can cause anxiety, at least until you figure out his or her agenda. A new boss leads to lower trust, after all, you worked hard to make the previous one successful and he or she left you when it was time to collect your rewards.

Remind yourself of the impermanence of all things. No boss is going to last for ever. Sometimes a new boss is a relief, at other times, a new boss is an inconvenience. It all comes down to how much your vision and projects are impacted.

The anxiety of transition will be impermanent as well. Channel your energies in the script for “house training” your new boss, so you have a change to influence your working relationship.

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#279 Defensive

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Defensive behavior looks and sounds like one or more of the following:

  • “I am not to blame.”
  • “It’s not my fault.”
  • “I’ve already explained myself.”
  • “Why am I repeating myself?”

There is a difference between being “firm” and being “defensive.” You need a way to deal with time wasters and bullies by being firm, but without being defensive.

Defensive behavior is less likely if you are open, ready to listen, ready to adapt, and ready to acknowledge a mistake.

If you have to offer a different point of view that contradicts your co-worker, do so as a matter of fact, without getting defensive. It takes a couple of attempts to get to a problem/situation description that everyone can agree upon. I’d argue that the fear of being wrong is perhaps the biggest reason for defensive behavior.

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