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Listening to a 4-star general speak can be an awesome experience. After all, he has more experience, more courage, more accomplishments than a lot of us mere mortals. More important, he has lived to tell the tale. Thus it was no surprise that General Stan McChrystal had a few leadership nuggets to share in a keynote address that I had the honor of attending:

• We are surrounded by uncertainty. It can be stressful or depressing. Whether you act out of faith, or just act, it is your duty to get out there and deal with it.
• A focused and disciplined approach is needed to understanding and appreciating the need to change.
• Responsibility is a burden. You have to bear it, not avoid it.

Here is my favorite:

• The more different you are from another person, the more time you need to spend understanding this other person.

This last advice solved a puzzle for me. Some relationships are like oil and water (think “bad marriage” or a “bad boss”). While it is easy to abandon the relationship, or escalate the conflict, or just give up, knowing it is not meant to be, a more challenging endeavor is to spend time understanding the other person. Difficulties will arise because you don’t have knowledge or information, or because you have trouble seeing the world differently.

Don’t go overboard to follow this guidance and don’t stress out when you face hardship. Show focus and discipline, and the common sense to take frequent breaks to recharge your batteries.